This has got to be the <b>single most frustrating thing</b> that has happened to me in recent memory.<br /><div style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LjWZ6besTZQ/VD8xoVhjtFI/AAAAAAAAKvw/KeXo9vefYKs/s1600/brokenlegbeast.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LjWZ6besTZQ/VD8xoVhjtFI/AAAAAAAAKvw/KeXo9vefYKs/s1600/brokenlegbeast.jpg" height="225" width="400" /></a></div><div style="clear: both; text-align: left;">For those who may not have read, <a href="http://www.sothisisfitness.com/2014/10/Beast2014.html">I finished the Spartan Beast at Mt. Killington, VT</a> (their World Championship course)...but long story short I broke my knee in the process. Now, I'm left with the aftermath - recovery, healing, and attempting to live daily life pretty much without the use of my left leg (for 6 - 12 weeks).&nbsp;</div><div style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Today marks the halfway point through my "initial recovery"...but man...<b>I've about had it.&nbsp;</b></div><i>(Forewarning - some pictures in this post might be slightly...gross.)</i><br /><a name='more'></a><br /><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="more"></a><br /><b>Injury sucks.&nbsp;</b> I really don't know how else to put it. For those who have had to deal with it, I'm sure you understand. For those who haven't...<b>be glad</b>.<br /><br />For "Average Joe" an injury is a big fat inconvenience... but as a fitness freak and a runner this is about a million times worse. But...before I launch into a rambling tirade...<br /><br /><b><span style="font-size: large;">So, what actually HAPPENED?</span></b><br /><div style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-NmsiirqE_RY/VD81dH-svGI/AAAAAAAAKv8/lee2h0KHzKQ/s1600/IMG_20140921_144024.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-NmsiirqE_RY/VD81dH-svGI/AAAAAAAAKv8/lee2h0KHzKQ/s1600/IMG_20140921_144024.jpg" height="320" width="180" /></a></div><b><br /></b><b>The Beast </b>was about 16.5 miles long. I went up ~6,500 ft and down ~6,500 ft. I must've done around 200 burpees (maybe more). <b>It took me 10 hours 16 minutes</b>. By the time I got to the very end - the Fire Jump - I was pooped. I'm talking a level of honest-to-God <i><u>exhaustion</u></i> I didn't know existed. <b>I saw the finish</b>. I ran. I <i>leaped</i>. I <u>hurdled</u> myself over those burning logs like I was about to win the Boston Marathon. It was <b>right there</b>...I was FINALLY about to finish!<br /><br /><b>Unfortunately</b>, the last bit of strength I had went into the lift-off....and <b>I had nothing left for the landing</b>.<br /><br />Do me a favor - stand up (yes, right now) and jump. Notice how when you land you bend your legs and kind of shock-absorb yourself?<br /><br /><b>Yeah...that didn't happen for me.</b><br /><br />So, when I landed, my femur (thigh bone) took my full weight plus my momentum and hammered it directly down into my tibia (calf/shin bone). My "medial tibial plateau" (the top side of the tibia facing the other leg) cracked under the pressure.<br /><div style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-tdD77Hm-ZYo/VD87wNhWjLI/AAAAAAAAKw4/ttrrgWjwl4c/s1600/IMG_20140929_141814679_HDR.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-tdD77Hm-ZYo/VD87wNhWjLI/AAAAAAAAKw4/ttrrgWjwl4c/s1600/IMG_20140929_141814679_HDR.jpg" height="225" width="400" /></a></div><b>I now have a titanium plate in my left leg. </b>It has some lovely screws and elegant swelling to go with it. From date of surgery I'm looking at 6 weeks until I can bear weight on the leg and an estimated 12 weeks until I'm running races unrestricted.<br /><br /><b><span style="font-size: large;">So here I am.</span></b><br /><b><br /></b><b>In the grand scheme of things, </b>it could be a lot worse. I could have soft tissue damage (ACL, MCL, etc). My knee could be <i>really, really </i>damaged and require much longer to heal. I could be looking at <i>never running again</i>.&nbsp;<b>But it's not, it doesn't, and I'm not</b>. I got lucky.<br /><br /><b>And instead of being grateful, I'm whining.</b><br /><b><br /></b><b>Why? </b><strike>Because I'm useless.</strike>&nbsp;Because I <i>FEEL</i> <b>useless</b>. I have to use crutches to get around, so I can't really carry things. Sure, I can throw on a backpack, sling my laptop bag and my lunch bag on...but then my balance is so whacked I fall over if someone breaths on me the right way. I can't do so many of the things I took for granted 4 weeks ago.<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OHLc2MqsTbQ/VD87mtM3JxI/AAAAAAAAKwo/FRxIUuFXfNw/s1600/IMG_20141007_125710263.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OHLc2MqsTbQ/VD87mtM3JxI/AAAAAAAAKwo/FRxIUuFXfNw/s1600/IMG_20141007_125710263.jpg" height="400" width="225" /></a><br /><br />I feel like an incredible burden on those around me - my friends and family who are helping me out <b>immensely</b>&nbsp;during this challenge. My poor wife...the "in sickness and in health" clause got invoked WAY before either of us expected.<br /><b><br /></b><b>And to top it all off, I can't run or work out!&nbsp;</b><br /><b><br /></b>I am a runner, a fitness freak, and <b>a gym manager</b>. I go to work 5 or 6 days a week and stare at treadmills I can't run on. I see weights I can't lift. I see all my members doing what I want to leap up and do.&nbsp;<b>It's maddening</b>.<br /><br />It makes the little victories and the progress difficult to appreciate.<br /><br />My swelling has gone down. I can get through the day-to-day without painkillers (not even Tylenol!). I can rest my foot on the ground enough to balance myself (but no more weight than that).<br /><br />Yesterday I even had a major milestone: &nbsp;<b>I hit 90 degrees range of motion.</b><br /><div style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cC_erJwY-1o/VD9BWPIF5gI/AAAAAAAAKxM/TamiEvC3c9U/s1600/IMG_20141015_110301762_HDR.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-cC_erJwY-1o/VD9BWPIF5gI/AAAAAAAAKxM/TamiEvC3c9U/s1600/IMG_20141015_110301762_HDR.jpg" height="225" width="400" /></a></div>But as soon as I'm done celebrating, its not long before I'm reminded of the frustrations. Y'know, when <b>I can't carry the coffee pot</b> to the sink to fill it with water.<br /><br /><b>I know this will pass.</b>&nbsp;Before I know it I'll be weight-bearing and then it'll be leaps and bounds and I'll be cycling, on the elliptical, and then back on the road. Until then, I need to focus on the progress, the little victories, and my rehab plan. I have to figure out how to workout once I'm cleared to weight-bear.<br /><br /><b>Focus on the positives. </b>My leg and my body may have found their breaking point, but I can't let my spirit and my mind find theirs. I will come back from this stronger and smarter than before.<br /><br />After everything I've been through, <b>nothing is going to keep me down.</b><br /><br />